FRIENDSHIPS: the simplest way to live

My Oh My, it yet another raining day – showers of blessings I sing.

My heart sings with joy as I pick that pair of shoes to rush out, the mornings are habitually weary most especially when the weather seem cold worsened by the fact that I am not married or will my married friends refute this. Well being a single lady, its easier to carry the morning – no tea, no children to prepare, no husband to awaken for a “morning glory” wink wink wink, it’s just me, my beautiful self.

On the other hand, my intelligent, cutest and loving friend Ma’ Kawesu defines herself as a woman with dignity; denotes for everything around her, a wife, mother and colleague. I love the way she carries her self around; young, energetic, strong and always has a solution for almost every problem that gets to her nerve. Being a fast thinker, she is a great home maker and never minds to squeeze her time for a little drinking and dancing as well as join the ‘gals’.

Clearly, I and she are on different notches and paths in life which make many to wonder as to whether we are true or not.

Simplicity is the key for unlocking complications in friendships, relations and lovers. Love shared will lead to understanding of every individual and be a perfect example. Ma’ Kawesu works on this tremendously as she knows you have only one true reality, to be truthful and honest to one another, being patient, which make her the envy and approbation from those in her well known class. Questions linger, how does she manage one who is not at par with her current status quo?

Truthfully, it’s the single lady in question here. Life is a give and take or give but you can not be taker all through and survive. Meaning that, from my own point of view it pointless and meaningless to have a friend who doesn’t understand you and take you as you are without necessarily trying to change your inborn character. Your inborn character is what makes you unique and appealing.

Where most of our married friends’ men and women alike go wrong is drop off their friends right before or after the D-day, believing that they are of no use. Yes, some of these friends need to be dropped at the earliest most especially if they are adding no value to your ‘New Life’. But my opinion is, test them before dropping them. I guess some married people will agree with me that some of this single men or ladies out there could be of great support.

‘Ma’ Kawesu’, on mention of her name puts a smile on my face, for I remember the good and bad times we have been together. Whenever I have a terrible issue at heart and she will always make sure to soften and bring the brilliant smile hidden in my heart to my face. One time, we were on phone and I remember her telling me to breathe in and out as she listened on the other side of the phone. I consider her my second sister from another mother right after my younger brilliant, lovely and spirited sister.

As a mother, I watch Ma’Kawesu discipline her little daughter Kawesu, “oh yeah she is married” and when she feels at it, can clearly discipline a neighbors’ child when she knows it will deteriorate the discipline she has taught her princess. At one point I almost laughed when she started complaining of a neighbors kid who was way older than Pesh, she said and I quote … “aki huyu mtoi wa jirani ananikasirisha anachukua kila kitu ya Pesh halafu anamfudisha kuwa rude …”  she murmured as she went on doing her house chores. In myself, I said these are kids but well each parent knows the best way to bring up their children, so I didn’t retort. My only mission then was to calm her down and make her realize that this are just kids and you can speak with them sternly and warn of the bad mannerism you had noticed. After the whole process and speaking with the child she was able to stop the influence it brought on her kid.

The above scenario makes a difference on the kind of friends we need to have for keeps, as much as your status quos are totally different the two might have one or two things to always share and give an opinion. At times it’s just that one person you consider a sister from another mother or a brother from another mother who will make you see reason in certain issues or rethink and reconsider certain situation.

Try not to make your life difficult, unhappy and sad as you are forced to search for new friends who are in your current eminence, well some might not understand you as well as the later unless their opinion and influence in your ‘new life and significant half’ is negative over and above.


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